Author: LeahDawnRoot29

Wreck-Less

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 14 Comments

“The wise are cautious and avoid danger; fools plunge ahead with reckless confidence.”  Proverbs 14:16 NLT

On a road trip, how many road signs does one follow to ensure they reach their arrival safely?  Some road signs caution people of icy bridges.  Others warn them to “stop”, “yield”, “merge”, “pass with care” and set speed limits according to the type of road one is traveling on.  There are very obvious road signs like “Do Not Enter”,  “Road Closed” or even “Detour” that when followed definitely ensure our safety.

What happens when we don’t obey these road signs?  What happens when we fail to stop, yield, merge, pass with care or obey the speed limits?  What happens if we go the wrong way or travel down a road that’s under construction?  What happens when we drive recklessly?  We get into a wreck injuring/killing ourselves and possibly others.  We damage our vehicles and inanimate objects all because we chose to ignore the signs that would ensure our safety and the safety of others.

There are road signs in life too.  They’re not as obvious or apparent though.  There are no neon blink signs navigating our decision making process but just like on a road trip, if we obey the warning signs, we make wise decisions and reach our life destination unscathed.  If we ignore them, we become reckless like the fool in Proverbs 14.

If life’s road signs aren’t visible, how do we know what they are?  We need to crack open God’s word and study it.  It’s filled with wisdom and warning signs that are created to protect us from all harm.   Those warning signs include protecting our bodies (1 Corinthians 3:16-17), protecting our hearts (Proverbs 4:23), and protecting our minds (2 Corinthians 10:5).  We can also seek out godly advice from spiritual leaders and to always pray for God’s direction and discernment.

But what if we choose to ignore God’s warning signs?  Our lives end up in a wreck.  Some reckless choices to our bodies include being overweight and having serious life threatening health issues.  They can also include unwanted pregnancies, STD’s and soul ties from premarital sex.  Addictions arise from failure to make wise choices and protect our bodies. Reckless damage to our hearts can include brokenness and a hardening because we pursued an abusive or dead-end relationship that God would never have chosen for us or from being unequally yoked to a unbeliever.  Failure to protect our minds can result in wrong thinking, believing the enemy’s lies, and creating fantasies of how life and relationships should be.  Whatever the reckless choice is, you can be sure you will experience a reckless consequence.

Thank God we have a Savior who can turn our recklessness into a life that is “wreck-less” IF we heed to His word.  God promises us time and again that we are to fear nothing because He is with us and He goes before us.  He also promises that if we need wisdom we should ask and He will give it.  (James 1:5) He used many examples through the lives of the Israelites that if they obeyed His “road signs” they would inherit an abundant life and dwell in the promise land.  He repeatedly gives examples in His word of how He redeemed some of the Bible Greats from recklessness and made them wreck-less instead.

When Adam and Eve made a reckless choice in paradise, one their consequences was banishment from the Garden of Eden.  But God didn’t destroy them.  He even made clothing for them since eating the fruit of knowledge revealed to them they were naked.  When Cain killed Abel, God punished Cain but protected him from being destroyed by anyone else.  When David wrecked his life with an affair and murder, God redeemed him and still made him King.   The Old Testament is filled with stories of recklessness, severe consequences, repentance and redemption.  Repentance and obedience are the keys to being redeemed and living a wreck-less life.

What decision are you facing today that with God’s wisdom you can avoid being reckless and severe consequences?  Are you facing a dating relationship and ignoring the nudges of the Holy Spirit telling you they’re the wrong one?  Are you facing peer pressure to try a drug or give up your virginity?  Are you married and being tempted to cheat on your spouse?  Do you struggle financially and dealing with overspending?  Are you diabetic and craving a sugary donut?  Whatever you’re facing-know this, the devil leads us into recklessness through temptation!

The devil is very subtle and crafty with his schemes (Genesis 3:1) and he uses temptation to turn us away from the warning signs God has given us.  He can even distort God’s word to fool us (like Adam and Eve) into wrecking our lives.  God warns us to not be wise in our own eyes (Proverbs 3:7.)  The Bible also tells us to stay alert for the devil prowls around like a hungry lion (1 Peter 5:8).  When we are steady in God’s word and seek His wisdom and discernment we can readily detect the devil’s schemes and avoid his traps before we end up in a wreck.  But we also have to resist temptation.   Jesus, Himself, on the night he was arrested, told His disciples to stay awake and be alert so they would not give into temptation (Luke 22). And Jesus knew temptation.  The enemy tempted Him three times in the wilderness.  Each time, Jesus resisted the devil and the devil finally fled from Jesus (Luke 4). That’s what God calls us to do-resist the devil and he will flee (James 4:7.)  We must also be aware of how he tempts us.  We must recognize the desires of the flesh in order to resist him.  And if we fall, we get back up, repent and become more dependent on Christ to keep us from falling again. We must also STOP falling into his same traps and expecting God to redeem us from a pit we keep jumping in.

“Resisting temptation is so hard” you say?  Tell me about it!  You’re preaching to the choir!  I suffer from retail therapy and overeating.  When I’m stressed out I want to go shopping and buy something that will make me feel better.  I want to overload on chocolate and junk food because it tastes so good while I’m eating it.  But I suffer grave consequences from both choices.  I struggle with both debt and weight issues.  I even struggled with serious health issues until I disciplined myself to cut out foods (including chocolate and caffeine) that I knew were making me sick.

I also know because I’m a single parent-I chased after the wrong relationship.  I failed to listen to the Holy Spirit nudging me to wait, nudging me I was unequally yoked and I suffered severe consequences because of it.  Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade my children for anything-they are the best thing that came from the relationship.  But I suffered tremendous heartache and emotional injury because I did not listen to the warning signs.  And my children suffered from my reckless choice also.

I know recklessness with my body, heart and mind all too well and if my mistake can prevent someone from wrecking his/her life, it’s worth sharing. I also know His redemption and want you to know it too.

The point of today’s blog is this:  If you don’t want to end up in a wreck, obey God’s word, heed His warnings and don’t live recklessly.   But if you, like me, have already wrecked your life, don’t count your life as over.  We have a God who can and will redeem you and turn your reckless choices into a wreck-less testimony.  I know because He has done it for me every day I surrender my ways to His ways and allow Him to transform my body, heart and mind back into what he made them all to be.  He started redeeming me the day I repented.  He’s calling you to repent too.   Repent and forgive and allow Him to redeem you and make you wreck-less too!

NO FEAR!

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 10 Comments

 

“As Goliath moved closer to attack, David quickly ran out to meet him.”

1Samuel 17:48 NLT

The other night I had a spiritual warfare dream.  In this dream, I had just moved into an older, two-story home with a large porch on the front.  I found myself in the living room area immersed in fear of an evil presence.  I tried crying out and rebuking the devil to cast out the evil but I had no voice.  I felt helpless and paralyzed.  I prayed for Christ to rebuke the enemy for me and to restore my voice.  Suddenly I became bold and angry.  Amidst a terror inside of me that was almost debilitating, I ran upstairs and started kicking in doors hollering at the enemy to show his face, daring him to come at me.  I ran into dark unfamiliar rooms not knowing what would be on the other side of the door, terrified but determined to face my enemy.  I was fed up with being afraid and I was chasing after this evil presence.  There was a room at the end of the hallway with a light on.   I never made it to that room.  When I noticed the light on I called the enemy out again and told him to show himself.  He came out of the lighted room cowering. When he appeared, he was nothing but a wiry, thin, pale faced thug-a thief who ran with his tail between his legs when I started ranting and thrashing at him to GET OUT!

Although I woke up exhausted, I had no doubt what my dream was telling me.  I have lived in fear most of my life.  Fear caused me to not try out for the softball team my freshman year of high school.  Fear kept me from studying in France for 5 weeks when I was a college student.  Fear kept me from pursuing my dream of being a professional singer/actor.  Fear also kept me in an abusive relationship.  It even still keeps me from visiting my dentist regularly.  God used this dream to show me what I needed to do with fear.  Face it. Run after it and kick it out of my soul.  Fear has no place in ruling my life or yours.

I have read repeatedly that the Bible says “Do not fear” 365 times.  Although I haven’t googled the validity of that statement, I’ve read enough of in Deuteronomy, Joshua and Isaiah alone to believe it’s true.  In His word, God repeatedly tells us to NOT FEAR, to not be afraid and to be still.  Each time He says it, He also adds, “for I Am with you…”  The Great I Am is with us all the time, everywhere we go.  Focusing on that alone should be enough to make us fearless.  But for most, for me at least, it’s not.  I needed God to show me how to not fear.

He not only showed me in my dream, He confirmed it this week through the story of David and Goliath.  You don’t have to be a Christian to be familiar with the story of a shepherd boy who took on a 9 foot (2.74 meters) giant and killed him with a slingshot and 1 stone. Some probably think it’s simply a fictional Sunday school story.  But the true believer knows it is truth because God’s word tells us so.

1 Samuel chapter 17 tells us David was Jesse’s youngest son.  While his older brothers were at war, David went back and forth between the soldiers’ camp and the sheepfold to help his father keep watch on his older brothers and the family sheep.  One specific day, Jesse, sent him to the camp with food for his brothers.  When David arrived, the Israelites and Philistines were in the midst of war. David ran out to meet his brothers.  This is the first time he sees Goliath taunting and terrorizing the Israelite army.  Men older and “braver” than David were frozen in fear because of one enemy who towered over them and taunted them.  To this point, anyone who had attempted to take on Goliath was murdered.  In human thinking, their fear was completely valid.

David was a man after God’s own heart before he became King of Judah.  What was David’s response to Goliath’s threats?  “Who is this pagan Philistine anyway, that he is allowed to defy the armies of the living God?(vs 26b)”  David had no fear of Goliath because David knew his God was bigger, stronger and mightier.  He couldn’t understand why the Israelites were so afraid of this giant. David recognized who Goliath really was-He wasn’t an enemy of the Israelites, Goliath was an enemy of God.  David knew no enemy of God’s ever wins-that confidence, made him fearless.

Even though David trusted God to defeat Goliath, he still received backlash from even his own family members regarding facing the giant.  David’s older brother, Eliab, was angry with David for talking to the other soldiers and asked him, ““What are you doing around here anyway? “What about those few sheep you’re supposed to be taking care of? I know about your pride and deceit. You just want to see the battle! (vs 28)” Eliab’s faith wasn’t as big as David’s and he didn’t see David as the man God created him to be.  Eliab only saw David as his annoying little brother who was just an action-junkie going to get in the way and get himself killed.

I love David’s response to his older brother.  “What have I done now?” David replied. “I was only asking a question! (vs 29)” Then he walked over and asked other soldiers the same question.  He didn’t bat an eye to his brother’s naysaying.  I imagine David was already hearing God calling him to face this giant and he was determined to obey God.  Nothing anyone said was going to deter David from his God ordained destiny or make him falter in his faith.

At this point, King Saul hears about David’s question and calls for him.  When David meets King Saul, the young shepherd boy boldly and confidently tells the king, “Don’t worry about this Philistine…I’ll go fight him! (vs 32)” To which Saul replied, ““Don’t be ridiculous! …There’s no way you can fight this Philistine and possibly win! You’re only a boy, and he’s been a man of war since his youth. (vs 33)”  And here’s what verses 34-37 tells us David’s reply was, “But David persisted. ‘I have been taking care of my father’s sheep and goats,’ he said. ‘When a lion or a bear comes to steal a lamb from the flock, I go after it with a club and rescue the lamb from its mouth. If the animal turns on me, I catch it by the jaw and club it to death.  I have done this to both lions and bears, and I’ll do it to this pagan Philistine, too, for he has defied the armies of the living God! The Lord who rescued me from the claws of the lion and the bear will rescue me from this Philistine!’”  The best part of that whole passage is the first sentence, but David persisted.   In spite of his own family not believing in him, in spite of the law of the land at that time having no faith in him, David persisted because he trusted God to defeat the enemy.  His persistent faith is what prompted Saul to finally say, ““All right, go ahead…And may the Lord be with you! (vs 37b)”

Even though Saul consented to David’s request, Saul still didn’t see David as the warrior God made him to be. Saul tried to dress David up in protective armor that actual held David back. If he had worn the man-made armor, David would have readily been defeated because it was too heavy, weighed him down, and not what David was used to. So David refused the armor and prepared for battle-how? He used what he knew, his staff and his slingshot.  His ammunition was 5 stones.  He ran toward his enemy, fearlessly and was practically a laughing stock to his family, the army he was fighting for and especially his enemy.  David looked square at his enemy and said, “You come to me with sword, spear, and javelin, but I come to you in the name of the Lord of Heaven’s Armies—the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. Today the Lord will conquer you, and I will kill you and cut off your head. And then I will give the dead bodies of your men to the birds and wild animals, and the whole world will know that there is a God in Israel! And everyone assembled here will know that the Lord rescues his people, but not with sword and spear. This is the Lord’s battle, and he will give you to us! (vs 45-47.) He loaded his slingshot, took aim and nailed Goliath square in the forehead, then cut off his head.  Did you catch that-David, a small shepherd boy killed a 9 foot giant by knocking him down with a slingshot and cutting off his head!  Why was David victorious?  Because he knew it was the Lord’s battle and he TRUSTED God to deliver the enemy to him.

When we lay our fear down, face the giants in His way and trust His might through us, He moves in a mighty way and makes us victorious too.  David had no battle plan. He was simply a natural born warrior and he used what he knew trusting God to do the rest.

As I write this, I’m listening to a sermon by Todd White, entitled, No Longer a Slave to Fear.  In this sermon Todd says, “[We] are not victims of circumstance-[we] are victorious.  We are sons and daughters of the King.  Let us not be bound by [the enemy’s] lies.  Don’t let your hope be deferred.  If it’s deferred, it’s because your hope isn’t set on what God says you are.  It’s impossible to have your hope deferred by circumstance when your hope is set on Jesus.”  The Israelites lived as victims.  David lived as the victor through Christ.  The Israelites lived without hope.  David’s hope was set on His God.  He knew, deep in his heart, that he was a mighty warrior made by God and that no enemy would be victorious in destroying his God-ordained destiny.  Because he was not a slave to fear, God’s destiny for him came to fruition over and over again.  David only knew defeat when he sinned against God or handled life by his own might.  But even then, when David repented, God raised him up again and made him victorious over all his enemies.

We all have a God-ordained destiny.  The only thing that can keep us from achieving that destiny is paralyzing fear.  We have a choice to be like David who ran after his enemy or be like the Israelites who doubted God and fought battles in their own human strength.   We can live to know who God made us to be, or we can live with a hope deferred and sick hearts (Proverbs 13:12.)  We should definitely pray and know God’s destiny for ourselves but once we know, we have to go.  As Todd White says, “we’re not going to pray about where to go, we’re just going to go.  Why?  Cuz’ ‘go’ is two-thirds of God (G-O-D.)”  If God is telling you to go-then go, fearlessly, and let God guide you along the way.

To blindly go, we will need faith like David and like Abraham.  When God told Abraham to go in Genesis 12, He didn’t spell out the plan step by step or detail by detail.  God only said, “Leave your native country, your relatives, and your father’s family, and go to the land that I will show you. (vs 1)”  God said GO then He promised to SHOW.  Too often we miss out on what God is calling us to do because we’re waiting for God to show before we go.  We need to take that leap of faith and go first.  Then trust God to show us the way.  We need to trust that God is moving mightily defeating every enemy that attempts to block us from His destiny for us.  But remember, He calls us to first GO.   He calls us to run after our enemy and trust Him to bring the victory His way, and in His time. Let us stop floundering like a wave tossed to and fro and let us go after what He has already laid on our hearts to achieve for His purpose and glory.

And Jesus Wept

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 4 Comments

Last week I rec’d a prayer request via text message regarding the sudden and tragic death of a young man.  I didn’t know him, but I know and love the person who was grieving his death and asking for prayers.  We spent the day texting back and forth trying to make sense out of God calling home someone whose life was fully dedicated to serving Him before this young man’s ministry could even begin.  In the midst of our conversation I felt the Holy Spirit prompt me to tell her this: “Although God is the One who called this young man home He is grieving over his death too because His children are hurting and immersed in grief.”  I believe the Holy Spirit talked through her as well when she responded with this; “It’s been raining all day here.  I imagine the raindrops are tears from Heaven pouring down.”

When tragedy happens, we tend to blame God first.  A few common questions people cry out when they’re in the pit of despair is “Where is God!?”  or “Why did He let this happen!?” In Psalms 22, the man after God’s own heart even cried out “My God, My God, WHY have You forsaken me.” In the midst of life shattering grief we wonder how a God who says He loves us could also allow us to feel such crippling pain.  And for some, grief will cripple them.  The pain can be so overwhelming they’ll harden their hearts simply so they don’t have to feel anything anymore.  Others will self-medicate or turn to another self-destructive behavior as a means of comfort that creates a false sense of numbness.

So where is God when tragedy happens?  He’s right there in the face of that tragedy and He’s right with you at the moment your heart shatters.   The second half of Deuteronomy 31:6 says “For the Lord my God personally goes ahead of me.  He will neither fail me nor abandon me.”  In Isaiah 43 God again promises He is with us always whether we go through deep waters or through the fire of oppression.  Psalm 23 tells us that even when we walk through the valley of the shadow of death He is with us-His rod and His staff comfort us.  Where is God-He is everywhere, all the time.  Even as His own son was beaten to the point of being unrecognizable, hung on a cross and stabbed in the side-God was there.

But why does He let tragedy happen?  My human response would be “Ask Job.  I’m sure he asked the same question when God allowed satan to take Job’s entire family and his prosperity only to prove Job’s faithfulness to Him.”  But I’d prefer to answer in God’s words with Isaiah 55:8-9 (NLT) “’My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts’ says the lord. ‘And My ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so My ways are higher than your ways and My thoughts higher than your thoughts.’”  As crude is this may sound, God is God and He does what He wants even if it hurts us or we cannot comprehend what He’s doing.  He does however promise to use everything, including tragedy for His glory and His purpose (Romans 8:28).

The same God who allowed His own son to be murdered, is the same God who wept when Lazarus died and is the same God who is grieving WITH you too.  Jesus wept.  The shortest verse in the Bible yet one that may bring greater comfort than hearing the Lord is near to the broken hearted.  Knowing God is with us isn’t always comforting, especially if we can’t feel His presence.  But what a great comfort in knowing He is grieving with us.  What a comfort to know it breaks His heart to break ours.

There are no right words to say when someone is in the midst of grief.  We offer, “I’m sorry for your loss” or send a sympathy card.  You can try to hold them tightly until they don’t hurt anymore but even that doesn’t truly take the pain away.  The only true healing comes from Jesus Himself. The same One Who breaks our hearts is the same One Who can take each shard of brokenness and piece it back together making our hearts whole again.  In Psalm 147:3 God promises to heal the brokenhearted and bind up all their wounds.  The word bind in Hebrew is chabash, which means to bind, bind on or bind up.  In exploring the thesaurus, another word for bind is to wrap or secure.  God, with His love and sovereignty is the only One who can wrap up our broken hearts and make them secure again, secure in His word and in His love.

I want to close today’s blog with a few lyrics from Danny Gokey’s, “Tell Your Heart to Beat Again.”  Ironically the story behind this song was based on a pastor wanting to see a heart surgery take place. In the midst of the surgery, after the heart had been repaired, they couldn’t restart it.  The doctor uncharacteristically spoke to his patient and said, “We’ve fixed your heart, there’s nothing wrong with it.  We just need you to tell your heart to beat again.”  Jesus, the Great Physician will fix our broken hearts too when we come into agreement with Him and tell our hearts to beat again.

“You’re shattered

Like you’ve never been before

The life you knew

In a thousand pieces on the floor

And words fall short in times like these

When this world drives you to your knees

You think you’re never gonna get back

To the you that used to be

“Tell your heart to beat again

Close your eyes and breathe it in

Let the shadows fall away

Step into the light of grace

Yesterday’s a closing door

You don’t live there anymore

Say goodbye to where you’ve been

And tell your heart to beat again”

May God’s loving grace and mercy fall on those who read this and are in a time of loss and grief.  As Solomon wrote in Ecclesiastes 3; “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens, a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance…”  My prayer for you is that God turns your mourning into dancing and you see God’s goodness prevail through the darkest storm I pray you will ever face.  To the family who lost their son and their church congregation who was present with them when their lives were forever changed, this was my prayer to our Abba:  “Lord, let even his death be a mighty miracle and testimony for Your glory.  Show them, show everyone who knew him and was touched by His life how this tragedy will be used for Your glory.  Let not his life nor his death be in vain.”

Unconditional

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 2 Comments

“And they will go to others and say, ‘I have sinned, I have perverted what is right, but I did not get what I deserved. God has delivered me from going down to the pit, and I shall live to enjoy the light of life.  God does all these things to a person-twice, even three times—to turn them back from the pit, that the light of life may shine on them.”              Job 33:27-30

This month, I was facing a $439 deficit that included having to purchase very much needed tires for my vehicle.  I had no idea where the money was going to come from.  I figured a budget multiple times, and  spent a few sleepless nights waking at 2am in a panic wondering how I was going to manage to cover the added expenses without falling behind on my other bills.  I prayed and then I worried, prayed-then worried.

Then I did something else-while I was still worrying, I texted many people asking them to pray for me and for God’s provision.  Asking others to pray for me is a challenge because I wrestle with pride and although I love to help others, I hate being in a position to ask for help.   But I asked, and they prayed.  And God delivered.

The week after Mother’s Day, I found a $100 bill in my purse.  $100 is NOT something I would easily forget and would panic if I lost so I knew it was not money I had placed there.  I learned a darling friend, knowing my prideful heart, slipped it into my purse.  She knew I wouldn’t accept an outright offer and would feel embarrassed and ashamed.  (I had another friend offer to send me the whole $439 but my pride would not let me accept the offer.) I praised God for the $100 blessing but still worried about where the rest would come from.

Time came where I had to get my tires.  I have a Christian mechanic who knows my situation and graciously offered to let me make payments on the purchase of my tires.  When I went in to discuss the payment plan, the officer manager lowered the price of the original quote he gave me saying he was going to make no money off the tires he was selling me.  I thanked him for discounting the price even more.  This meant less I would have to make payments on.  Two days later I had the new tires placed on my vehicle.  I walked into the office and was greeted by the owner of the auto shop whom I’ve become friends with as we attended a 9 month training together recently.  I reminded the owner I was on a payment plan. He handed me a receipt showing $0 balance and told me I didn’t owe him anything.  He wanted to gift me the tires.

Tears welled up in my eyes.  I was so overwhelmed with this generosity, not even my pride could keep me from crying in front of him.  As he hugged me, I told him I couldn’t possibly accept such an elaborate gift. My whole being just felt I didn’t possibly deserve such a gift.   He said he wanted to bless me but if I wasn’t comfortable accepting it then I could pay him.  Before I could respond, the company phone rang and he answered it.  While he was on the phone, another line started ringing.  He was the only one in the office so I offered to help him out by answering the second phone call.  He handed me the phone.  When the two phone calls were taken care, to appease my pride I jokingly told him I had just worked off the tires so I felt better in receiving his gift.  We both laughed and I left the auto shop with a brand new set of tires and a heart filled with an unexplainable awe of God’s goodness and love for me.

Driving home I heard Sidewalk Prophets, But You Loved Me Any Way.  As I sang along to the radio, between sobs I belted out these words:

“I am a thorn in Your crown, But You love me anyway
I am the sweat from Your brow
But You love me anyway
I am the nail in Your wrist
But You love me anyway
I am Judas’ kiss
But You love me anyway
“See now, I am the man who yelled out from the crowd
For Your blood to be spilled on this earth shaking ground
Yes then I turned away with the smile on my face
With this sin in my heart tried to bury Your grace
And then alone in the night I still called out for You
So ashamed of my life, my life, my life…”

I didn’t deserve any of the blessings God bestowed on me this month. In fact, I don’t deserve any blessing He has ever given.  I fail Him every single day.  I start my mornings reading His word and praying only to lose my temper and drop an F-bomb before I walk out the door.  That’s not even a dent in the long list of sins I have committed and will commit in my lifetime.  But God loves me, anyway.

Many scriptures tell us God’s love is unconditional. But it’s only when I receive blessings I don’t deserve that I gain a better understanding of what ‘unconditional’ means.  With every undeserved blessing a piece of pride is plucked from within me, my heart is humbled a little more and I find myself offering greater grace to others because of God’s grace and mercy offered to me.  All praise, glory and honor are lifted up to my Father in Heaven, who is my Great Provider and does not give me what I deserve but delivers me time and time again from going down in the pit.  I know He will do the same for you too because trust me, I’m nobody special. But to God, I’m worth dying for, and so are you.

Its Snowing…In May?!!!!

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 4 Comments

“Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”

Proverbs 19:21 NIV

Like most people I have BIG plans for my life.  As a little girl I aspired to be a Solid Gold dancer or a singing contestant on Star Search.  Don’t judge (but please feel free to laugh out loud!)  Any child of the 80’s with a creative mind like mine and a gift for making a fool out of themselves in front of a crowd, had the same dreams.  When I was 12, I wanted to be president of the United States.  By the time I completed high school my goal was to earn my college degree, get married, become a mom and have a successful career helping troubled teens.  On my 25th birthday I cried-I had only accomplished one of my goals and I was working 3 jobs just to make ends meet.  Now at 40, I am a single mom working 2 jobs, still struggling to make ends meet and clearly in the midst of a mid-life crisis.  Today I want to travel and touch lives all over the world letting people and orphans know they matter and they are loved.

The past couple of months I have been restless- physically, emotionally and spiritually. This restlessness has boiled into fear and anxiety.  It’s become a serious condition like a rash that takes over your entire body or a virus that eats you from the inside out.  It invades my dreams, it wakes me in the middle of the night and it robs my joy during the day.  The simplest task can become easily overwhelming when fear is hitting me full blast.  I become easily angered or I sob.  I’m exhausted but can’t seem to get a good night’s sleep because my mind simply won’t shut down or be still.  People who know this struggle about me often ask what I’m so anxious about.  Sometimes I tell them I don’t know. But I think I’ve figured it out.  I simply feel stuck.  My life feels stuck in a season of winter and at this age of my life, I am afraid I will stay stuck in winter forever.

Did I mention I HATE winter?  I’m speaking of the actual season.  Where I live we get very cold, very long and very snowy/icy winters.  Days are dull and skies are gray.  Many days I drive to and from work in the dark and never see any daylight.  I get quite depressed.  By the time February and March arrive I am anxious for warm days, sun filled skies and for all the snow to melt away.  We tend to get a mid-winter thaw-a few warm days here and there but then we get slammed with more cold, more snow and more ice.  April arrives and I check the weather daily hoping for a hint of even 50 degree (10c) weather.  And in May, I celebrate the colors of green, the blooming of apple blossoms and spring time flowers.  I relish the smell of the first lawn mowing and celebrate the year’s first real thunderstorm.  I buy my park pass and count down the days until the lakes are warm enough to swim in while planning out my beach days for the summer.  My spirits lift as I think snow is finally gone and my toes will be buried in the sand in not time.

This past weekend, in Mid-May, it snowed!  As I woke Sunday morning to a dusting of white powder covering my lawn, I reflected on my life and feeling stuck in a winter season.  I have so many plans for my life, yet none of them seem to be coming to fruition.  It’s like my life has come to a standstill with no hopes of moving forward relationally, financially, spiritually or even in my career.  Seeing that snow outside my window, I thought “That’s it, winter is never going to end, summer is never going to arrive.  All my beach days are never going to happen.”  Reflecting on my life, I tend to think “My dreams are dead.  This is it.  This is as good as it gets.  God just wants me stuck.”

But God has a different answer.  Weather wise, He’s shown it by gifting us with a prediction of 70 degree temps (21c) later this week.  Life wise, He says “Don’t worry,” (Matthew 6:34.) He keeps sending me Proverbs 19:21 and a few other verses like Job 23:14 and Isaiah 46:10.  He gently reminds me that His way is better than my way and I simply need to surrender my hopes and dreams to Him.  After all, every dream He planted in my heart will come to pass in His time.  Because patience is not a virtue I was born with and God knows I LOVE being in control, He makes me wait, refining me and conditioning me into the Kingdom Woman He designed me to be to do the big things He has planned for me.  Dreams He’s already shown me, I’ve turned into idols and tried manufacturing my own miracles instead of trusting Him to bring them to pass.  I always lose when I get in God’s way.

Winter is a time when days are shorter and life slows down.  This winter season in my life is God’s way of teaching me to just “be still.”  I make myself restless because instead of obeying Him, I act like a crazy hamster in a plastic wheel running a race that will never end, chasing after empty things, and going absolutely nowhere.  If you’re in this same season, remember this-a wise woman recently told me, “There’s never been a year summer didn’t come.” With that I will add, there’s not a story in the Bible where God’s dreams and purpose didn’t happen either. Practice being still, practice trusting in Him and read His word every day.  When someone I love dearly was going through an incredibly difficult time, we read the book of Psalms together.  Psalms was the same book suggested to me just this week to read and pray, as a means to overcome my fears and anxiety.

Lastly, find contentment in every day no matter how long you’ve been waiting, longing and praying.  Most importantly-don’t lose hope, but place your hope in the One who gives us something to hope for.

Trash or Treasure?

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 2 Comments

In my twenties I watched a home improvement show that involved renovating specific rooms in people’s homes.  At the end of each episode they showed a five minute clip where the hosts of the show would purchase used items from rummage sales or junk yards and transform them into decorative useful items-like turning one person’s “trash” into their own beautiful “treasure.”  I loved watching the room makeovers but I especially enjoyed the “trash to treasure” portion at the end.  I was so amazed at the creativity the hosts had and how talented they were in crafting something someone considered “junk” into home décor.  One episode in particular they changed window screens into a headboard and used the screen portion as a jewelry hanger for earrings.  Coming from a mind who’s craftiness consists of finding an idea on Pinterest and having someone else make it for me, those hosts were crazy inventive for sure!!!

Last week I had a conversation with a co-worker, that reminded me of that show.  The show itself was not discussed but a simple phrase the co-worker spoke to me and God later reinforced.  “God used something awful to make a beautiful treasure.”  She spoke this phrase several times as our conversation was ending. It was her response when I shared with her how I had been conceived.  Without giving too many personal details, I was born out of wedlock.  I became a Christian at a young age and learned all the “do’s” and “don’ts” of Christianity through a “fire and brimstone” theology.  If you do all the right things and don’t sin-then you’re in God’s will and you get to go to Heaven.  If you sin, you’ll burn in Hell.

Learning this type of theology and knowing how I was conceived, I grew up believing God had no plan for me.  How could He?  I was the bi-product of a sinful act-clearly I was something He just allowed to happen, thus He had no plan for me.  I was just here to exist and then die.  Those thoughts were lies from the enemy but as a young Christian I didn’t dig deep into my Bible and seek out my own understanding of the faith, I just listened to what a preacher told me and took it as “truth.”  It took years well into my adulthood, a road of my own rebellion and some real godly people investing in me before I started reading my Bible and learning my own truths of Christianity and God’s purpose for our lives.

God divinely placed my co-worker in my path that day to take a bathroom break the same time as me and to turn a conversation into a beautiful message from Him and this blog post.   I heard her say; “God doesn’t like sin.”

“He took something He didn’t like and turned it into a beautiful treasure.”

“That treasure is you.”

“You are His treasure.”

And it was all very hard to digest.  The whole time the enemy was fighting hard to remind me of who he fooled me into believing I was for so many years.  But I fought past it and I let what I believe the Holy Spirit spoke through her resonate inside of me.  I was nearly in tears when I left the office and headed to the grocery store.  It was while shopping I thought of the show that turned trash into treasure.  And I thought, “That’s what she means!  That’s what she’s saying.”

Sin is our trash.  It can come in some pretty packaged forms but it’s really ugly, smelly and if we stay in it too long it weighs us down and can even make us sick-spiritually, emotionally and physically.  But what does God do with our trash-what can He do with our sinful acts?  Through His grace, mercy and redeeming love, when we repent, He turns our sin into treasure He can use for His kingdom.

David and Bathsheba had an affair.  Bathsheba became pregnant.  David tried to cover up the affair.  Out of desperation he even had Bathsheba’s husband murdered and took Bathsheba as his own wife.  Although the baby Bathsheba carried died, God blessed them with Solomon, who was the wisest king of Judah. (2 Samuel chapters 11 and 12)  Out of Solomon we have the books of Ecclesiastes, Proverbs (treasured wisdom), and the Songs of Solomon (treasured love.)

Christ’s crucifixion was also a bi-product of sin-the Pharisees’ sin, the roman soldiers’ sin, even your and my sins and we didn’t even exist then. But God used Christ’s resurrection, rising from a grave and overcoming death as a beautiful treasure that wipes our sins clean washing us white as snow and promising us eternal life. (Isaiah 1:18.)

When the enemy tries throwing your trash (sinful past) in your face, remind him that you are God’s treasure.  Quote Romans 8:28 aloud and tell the enemy to back off because God promises to use all things (even our sinful choices) for good and for His glory.  And remind yourself of whom you are in Christ.  He created our inmost beings and knitted us in our mother’s wombs. (Psalm 139:13)  Ephesians 2:10 tells us we are His masterpieces.  He has a plan and a purpose for each and every one of us. (Psalm 139:16, Ephesians 2:10 and Jeremiah 29:11)Don’t let the enemy waste another moment of your life fooling you to believe you are anything less than who God made you to be.

Sand Paper People (or How to Effectively Produce Pearls)

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 5 Comments

Last week, during my leadership training, I met an abrasive woman (or as I like to say, a sand paper person) whose demeanor was quite unwelcoming.  While discussing the rules and regulations of building usage she displayed an attitude of inconvenience mixed with an overabundance of micromanagement.  Every encounter with her created an increase in my annoyance level that felt like sand paper going across my skin (or to others perhaps like nails on a chalkboard.)  At one point she interrupted our class to have a group of us move our vehicles to another side of the building to make parking more convenient for others who would be coming/going in the building.  THAT was my breaking point.  Although I calmly moved my vehicle, when our class reconvened, I failed to bite my tongue.  The comment I made wasn’t incredibly rude or malicious but was still a clear display of my dislike for this woman’s personality.  I was immediately convicted in my spirit and reminded comments like that do not produce pearls.

Yes, you read that last sentence correctly-produce pearls.   Last year, one of my best friends texted me about a dream she had.  In the dream, God spoke one word to her for me-refinement.  She shared the word but nothing else. It was up to me to receive the message and figure out what God meant regarding His refinement for me.  I prayed asking God to give me wisdom and show me specifically what He meant regarding the refinement of me.  Traditionally refinement is compared to the melting of precious gold or silver.  It’s placed into an inferno and melted down to cleanse the metal from all impurities.  It’s said the metal stays in the fire until it’s so pure the maker can see his own image in the metal.  The metaphor behind that is that God refines us (Christ’s death even cleanses us from all our impurities) into His image (Malachi 3:3, 1John 1:7 and Zechariah 13:9)

After praying, I read Malachi 3:3 and googled “Refiner’s Fire.” During my research on refinement, I felt God speak “sand paper” to me.  My human thinking thought about sand paper in the literal sense-a rough abrasive material that creates smooth surfaces on wood.  So, I thought God’s refinement meant he was using sand paper people and sand paper like situations to sanding me down into a softer image of Him.  But then I heard God speak the word “Pearls” to me and I remembered how a clam produces a pearl.  At least I thought I did until I was trying to explain God’s refinement for me to a good friend and it wasn’t making sense to him, or to me.

So I went back to Google and researched how a pearl is made.  I read that when a clam gets an irritant (usually a grain of sand) in its muscle it produces a protective layer around the irritant in order to protect itself from being harmed by the irritant.  Those protective layers are the pearls we wear in various forms of jewelry.  And then it “dawned” on me.  God was teaching me that my refinement was the same as a clam producing a pearl.  Instead of allowing people and situations to affect me in negative ways that caused me harm by stealing my joy and exhausting me from being so angry and frustrated I needed to form protective layers and produce pearls.

This past year God has shown me a variety of ways I can produce pearls.  The Bible teaches us to not let the sun go down on our anger (Ephesians 4:26) put away all bitterness, wrath and malice (vs 31) and to “be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as Christ forgave you.” (Vs 32 NLT) Colossians chapter 3 tells us to clothe ourselves with “protective layers” of tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.  Four of these are also listed in Galatians 5 along with love, joy, peace, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control-all classified as “fruits of the spirit.” And speaking of fruit, Jesus used parables about bearing fruit as a metaphor in showing His love to everyone we encounter.

Over and over the Bible tells us to love each other as Christ loves us, and to forgive as Christ forgave us.  Producing pearls is an act of mercy, a display of kindness, the key to humility, an opportunity to practice patience and the perfect source of gentleness.  When we “sweat the small stuff”, we become a clam that allows the irritant to injure its muscle; injuring ourselves and others physically, emotionally and spiritually. Our negative reactions damage our character as well.  When we practice producing pearls, the irritant can’t harm us. The people around us also receive the blessings of precious gemstones in the forms of our humble, gentle, and kind responses. No matter what type of sand (or sand paper) people or circumstance may throw at you, always choose to produce pearls.  And this is something that clearly I am still working on “practicing what I preach” as well.

I’m Not Gonna Write You a Love Song….

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 4 Comments

Ever listen to the lyrics of “Love Song” by Sara Bareilles?  In it she sings, “I’m not gonna write you a love song, cause you ask for it, cause you need one, you see, I’m not gonna write you a love song, cause you tell me it’s make or break in this, if you’re on your way.  I’m not gonna write you to stay, all you have is leaving, Imma need a better reason to write you a love song, today.”  I heard once she was inspired to write this song after a record company demanded she write them a love song for production.  This could be fact or fiction but personally, I love her response to their demand and I love the song.

Valentine’s Day is right around the corner and as they say, “love is in the air.”  I’ve been thinking about a blog topic on the subject and then recently I heard the above named song.  It validated my thoughts on the subject of Valentine’s Day and love.

February 14th is a day filled with many emotions.  For those married or in a relationship there is an expectation of romantic gestures that may include the traditional chocolates, flowers, jewelry and/or candle lit dinners.  For those unattached, there’s a reminder that they are, well, still unattached.  To some single folks, it’s a day they are even more thankful to be unattached because the pressure to meet romantic expectations from their significant other is non-existent.  But this can also be a day of great disappointment when, if you’re attached, your significant other fails to “deliver” or meet your idea of romance.  All in all, it’s a day filled with great expectations, false hopes and honestly, is a worldly view of love.

In thinking about what to write for this post, I researched the history of Valentine’s Day. What I discovered was a man sainted for privately marrying young lovers who were forbidden to marry because the leader of that day thought young unmarried men made for better warriors than those who had wives and children.  He was reportedly martyred for his actions.  The day is believed to be named after him because he reportedly sent a letter signed “Your Valentine” to a woman he loved just before his death.  So the holiday is possibly named after a man who believed in marriage to the point it cost him his life.  Yet somehow it’s been turned in to a commercialized holiday that measures love by expensive gifting and big romantic gestures.

I confess to you that for years I bought in to the romantic notions of Valentine’s Day.  When I was in a relationship I hoped for chocolates, cards that expressed my partner’s deep love for me, roses (of course!) and a romantic night out at a fancy restaurant.  I am, after all, a hopeless romantic.  I love romantic comedy movies, especially when the lovers split up but get back together in the final moments of the movie and you’re left to assume they live “happily ever after.”  My favorite fairytale was Cinderella and yes, there were days I dreamt of a prince rescuing me.

Funny thing about reality though-it’s not as romantic as the movies or the fairytales.  I experienced some very wonderful Valentine’s Days only to be dumped later on and feeling like everything was just a lie.  I have also spent many more Valentine’s Days single, alone and throwing a pity party believing I was undesirable and not relationship or marriage material.

This past year I let go of a false love I had been holding on to most of my life.  It took someone I thought I deeply loved, behaving in a cowardly manner to push me to explore what real love is.  My journey led me to 1 Corinthians 13 (Love is patient and kind, etc.) and 1 John 4 (God is love, we love because He first loved us.)  It also took me to Romans 9 which talks about love being sincere (don’t just pretend to love others, really love them.)  In the book of Psalms I discovered an unconditional love that supersedes any kind of human love, even between a parent and child.  I studied the different types of love in the Greek language also.  In all my exploration I learned that real love is my real God.

My God sacrificed Himself, His life even, for my salvation.  He seeks to spend quality time with me every day.  He desires to have the most intimate relationship a human and spiritual being can share with me.  THAT is real love.  He doesn’t send me chocolates but He gifts me with fields of wild flowers every summer.  He doesn’t sing me love songs but He wrote the book of Psalms and the Song of Solomon reminding me of His unfailing, uninhibited love for me.  He doesn’t shower me with expensive jewelry but He makes the water look like diamonds when His sunshine dances across the waves.  He doesn’t take me out to romantic dinners, but I have coffee with Him every morning while reading His word and my devotionals.

If you’re married or in a romantic relationship, ask yourself this question:  Does my partner love me like Jesus does?  Do I love my partner the same way?  If the answer is yes, praise God for experiencing His real love through your partner and for using you to be His tool of love also.  If the answers is no, ask God to show you how you can start loving your partner like He loves you this very day.

If you’re single remember this, singlehood doesn’t define you.  It’s a simply a relationship status.  But since God never leaves us nor forsakes us, you are never alone.  The next time somebody asks you about if you’re dating or married, just tell them you’re in a committed relationship with God and He’s the best partner a person could ever ask for.

One last reminder before I close-Just like we shouldn’t be thankful only one day of the year like on Thanksgiving Day, we also shouldn’t be focused on love one day year either.  LOVE is a daily choice to show toward everyone God puts in your path.  Let February 14th come and go and choose to love every day because God doesn’t just love you on Valentine’s Day.  He shows His love for us every day.

Want versus Need….

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 2 Comments

“So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him.”

Matthew 7:11 NLT

Have you heard the saying, “God doesn’t give us what we want, He gives what we need.”  I have-many times and unfortunately I believed it for many years.  After all, there are many things I want, have asked for in prayer even, but since I haven’t received them yet, this saying must be true, right? Wrong!

God has always provided me everything I need from the very basics of oxygen to breath to food, water, clothing, a roof over my head and even reliable transportation.  But is that really all God is going to give me, or you?  No, God gives us more than the bare necessities.  His word is full of promises that go beyond what we need.  Psalms 37:4 tells us if we delight in Him, He will give us the desires of our hearts.  Desire is another word for “wants”, not “needs.”  Abraham desired a child.  He didn’t need an heir.  He told God he planned to leave his fortune to a servant. (Genesis 15:2) Attempting to manufacture his own miracle he created a son with Hagar.  But God still gave him the heir He promised. God still gave him Isaac.

David and Bathsheba committed adultery and from their sin produced a son. As punishment for David’s attempt to cover up his sin God took the life of that child shortly after his birth.  But that wasn’t the end of David and Bathsheba’s story.  What did God do next? He gave David and Bathsheba another son, Solomon.  David had other children already-Solomon wasn’t a need.  Solomon was a want that God gave them. (2 Samuel 12:14, 24)

Matthew 7:11 compares God to earthly parents.  If you’re a parent I am confident you wear yourself out providing for the basic needs of your children, but you do more than that.  Don’t we as parents strive to give our children what they want too?  Don’t we delight in seeing our children’s joy when they receive that special present they longed for, not necessary something they need but something they will find true delight in.  I believe God does that for us too.  Within reason, God gives us what we want too.

Provided our desires line up with His will, He promises that whatever we ask for in His name, it will be done. (John 14:13-14) “Whatever” certainly doesn’t sound like just our basic needs. Whatever means everything we ask for in Jesus’ name, will be given to us.  The key phrase is “in Jesus’ name”-meaning in His will.  And God’s will is to definitely give us more than what we need-He longs to see the joy on our faces as we receive His blessings, that special present we’ve longed for no matter how long we’ve been asking Him for it.

What is the desire of your heart?  Is it a godly marriage, children, a dream job?  Have you aligned it with God’s will for your life?  Marriage, children, even careers aren’t anything we need.  But if they are part of God’s plans “for good, to prosper…to give us hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV) then we have to trust that He will give them to us. Just like our children ask us for wants (or if you aren’t a parent, remember the wants you asked your own parents) we can boldly approach our Heavenly Daddy asking Him for our wants too.  Keep in mind, God is not a genie-we can’t rub a lamp and ask Him to grant us 3 wishes.  But God does delight in showering His blessings upon us, including gifting us with “the desires of our hearts.”

Testing, Testing, 1-2-3…

/ LeahDawnRoot29 / 2 Comments

“Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” Hebrews 11:1

Ever find yourself waiting endlessly for an unfulfilled dream?  Perhaps it’s something you prayed for and believed God to give, maybe even a desire you believe God planted in your heart.  No matter how close you get to achieving that dream, the door seems to shut each and every time.  If you’re like me, you’re left wondering why?  You may question if you heard God correctly.  You may even think God must want the complete opposite for you (yep, I’ve thought that one many times too.)

Whenever the desire of my heart becomes a deep longing ache that seems like it will never be fulfilled, I think of Abraham and his dream of an heir.  God promised an heir to Abraham before He changed Abraham’s name.  But the promise didn’t happen overnight.  It didn’t happen 9 months from the day God spoke to Abraham.  It didn’t happen when Abraham tried creating his own miracle by sleeping with Hagar and producing Ishmael.  It took 25 years for God to give Sarah and Abraham, Isaac.  He was nearly 100 years old when he finally received God’s promise specifically for him.

There are a lot of studies on the lessons learned from Abraham’s waiting:  trusting God without questioning, undying faith, refinement through the process of waiting.  But the greater lesson learned is not Abraham’s waiting, it was the test God put him through after he received his promised heir.  Abraham’s waiting for 25 years, moving to a strange land, separating from his nephew, fathering a child that wasn’t God’s promised child-all of that was enough testing to break the average person’s faith.  Even though Abraham remained obedient, God still tested him further by asking Abraham to sacrifice his promised heir.

Some of you not familiar with this story might be thinking “Are you kidding me?  What kind of a God would not only take away the promise He gave but ask someone to kill their own child?  Is God playing mind games with Abraham?” Some might even think God was cruel to do that? But it wasn’t about cruelty or mind games, it was about opportunity.  The opportunity for Abraham to show who he loved most-God or his promised son, Isaac?  And Abraham proved his greater love for God.  Because of Abraham’s faith in that final test, God spared Isaac.  Abraham’s obedience brought the rest of the promise to fruition for we are all descendants of Abraham.

What is the desire of your heart?  Has God fulfilled your desire or are you still in the waiting season?  Have you received the promise but suddenly faced with the possibility of losing it?  God may even be calling you to sacrifice the very thing He gave you, the dream or person you prayed for and love most in this world, merely to see if who or what you love more, the dream, the person, or Him? If the promise came from God, no matter what happens, God will provide the ram, just like He did for Abraham. He will give you the desire of your heart.  God always keeps His promises.   So don’t doubt Him, just obey.  Obedience is the best way to pass God’s tests.  Abraham was the picture perfect example of that.   For greater details on Abraham’s faith read Genesis chapters 12-22.